How to survive the end of the world


Courtesy of Forbes

It’s happening. As many have heard, the zombie apocalypse is almost here. It started with deer, and the invasion is making its way to humans next. Do you have a plan?


Maybe the thought of an apocalypse freaks you out, or maybe it’s always secretly been your dream to fight zombies. Either way, you’ll have to make a plan, because the zombie apocalypse is officially upon us.


You may have noticed the deer around town frothing at the mouth and snacking on their fellow species. Be sure to stay clear, because these antlered zombies are out for human flesh, and everyone knows what happens when you get bit.


First, you’ll need to know what not to do. Obviously, everyone is going to be rushing to the stores right away. Stay away from grocery stores, like Kroger and Target, these are a death trap. Obviously, the government will attempt to maintain control of the population, but the single worst mistake you can make during the apocalypse is listening to the government.


While all of your friends are busy getting eaten by zombies, you can be safe and efficient by avoiding the city at all costs and running away from civilization. Highways are overrun by the living dead, so take a trip down some good old country roads instead. Follow back roads until you reach open lands or a vacant town. This is a great place because there’s little threat of other people, and it is unlikely for it to be taken over by zombies since it is so open. Make sure whatever place you find to hide out is near a waterway – this is a quick and easy escape route in case of a zombie invasion.


Once you’ve found the perfect spot to settle down, even if it’s only temporary, it’s important to keep it safe and hidden. Building barricades is imperative when dealing with the living dead. Use whatever it takes, barbed wire, wood, makeshift walls, natural surroundings, etc. If you want to live, you’ll have to keep everyone out – dead or alive.


Another point to keep in mind is what supplies you’ll be needing. It’s not always easy to access the weapons that are preferable for killing zombies and staying alive. Farming supplies, such as a garden hoe or a shovel, are great alternatives to weapons. Make sure to bring a water bottle with a built-in filter, this way you’ll never run out of water. Gather all the medications you can; it doesn’t matter what they’re for, they’ll come in handy eventually.


Don’t worry, you won’t have to give up all of your luxuries for the apocalypse. After the initial panic has worn away, the stores will begin to clear. Keep in mind that everything is free in the zombie apocalypse. Take your pick of clothes, food, books, etc. It’s not shoplifting: it’s survival.


One final thing to keep in mind is to be apprehensive to meeting and trusting new people. Remember, zombies aren’t the only monsters; people will do anything to survive, even if that means hurting others. Stay with your group and when you do meet new people, don’t tell them too much. Protect your group at all costs.


The most important way to prepare for the zombie apocalypse is to make a perfect plan, but make sure you never share it with anyone. Once the apocalypse comes, the world will become a competition to live, survival of the fittest. There are no friends during the ending of the world.


Now all we have to do is wait.